October 7, 2010

sufficiency

This semester has definitely been eye-opening and challenging. One of the things that I am slowly learning is to trust that Christ is enough, that he is sufficient in every circumstance. He is what I need and he is my joy. No single thing or person can satisfy as he does.

But, I find myself struggling in this. I miss my friends. I miss familiarity and the feeling of being known and understood deeply by others. Sure, I still have plenty of friends and many relationships. Unfortunately, by the very nature of devoting my days from 6am - 8pm to school and classes this semester, I simply don't have the time for these sweet friendships. I literally wake up, go full speed for hours and then fall into bed. I have very little precious time for phone calls and coffee dates that I absolutely love. Thankfully, the Lord is teaching me to trust him for this, but it's not easy. I struggle with missing great friendships, and wanting to share life with the encouraging, challenging great friends I have.

I know this is a season, and only a season. For that, I am so thankful. These months will continue to fly by and I will find myself in yet another transition period soon. But, until I get there, I am seeking to honor the Lord in the way I spend my moments and in the thoughts I dwell on. I could choose to sit in the muck and wallow in my want for more time, conversation, energy and friendship. (Which I struggle with each day.) Instead, I am pursuing the sufficiency of Christ, rather than being validated and getting my needs met by others. I absolutely love a great conversation and find myself longing to know about others' hearts, and about what the Lord is teaching them. But, the Lord has been showing me my sin and pride in relying on others to fulfill this desire in me. He has stripped me of my time to show me my complete need for him in each moment. 

So, rather than running and longing for the time to share with others, I am trying to rest in the Lord, because he is enough. I miss my friends, really, all of them. If you are reading this, you are missed. But I know he is faithful and meets all of my needs. I've known this in my head for so long, but I'm slowly working on trust in this new way. I am continually praying for grace to trust him more. In this season he has me in, I am trusting this promise:  "And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work." - 2 Cor. 9:8

2 comments:

slynnt said...

I miss you!!!! And feel just as busy..

grace said...

I'm missed?
But I'm right here!

Really though, I know just how you feel